Normally I ignore this sort of story, but… well…
“Along with the list of nine drugs found in her system, Anna Nicole Smith’s autopsy report also reveals that her “anus is unremarkable.”
I guess that’s why Smith never really seemed to have that elusive “star quality.”
I was just reading this unintentionally hilarious article in the New York Time Sunday Magazine about a couple in Manhatten who have decided to live as close to a “zero impact” lifestyle as possible. They use no toilet paper, they buy no foodstuffs- or much of anything- that comes from more than 250 miles away- the distance a theoretical farmer could travel in a day. It’s almost a 19th century lifestyle- but with 20th century medicine. I don’t think either would turn down a defibrillator or modern anesthesia. Oh, and they don’t turn down gifts, either, should somone give them a needed piece of clothing, or, I assume, a wad of cash.
And there are other exceptions to this pioneer life. They still employ a cleaning woman, but she’s not allowed to use a vacuum or paper towels- which put me in mind of a friend’s comment regarding how so many people have strong moral codes that only other people have to follow.
What brought on this self-flagelliating lifestyle? Well, as the Mrs. notes, she saw “An Inconvenient Truth” in an air-conditioned movie theater last summer.
“It was like, ‘J’accuse!’ ” she said. “I just felt like everything I did in my life was contributing to a system that was really problematic.”
(And the last thing you’d want is a problematic lifestyle.)
Apparantly this new lifestyle has made them so smug that neither has thought about the implications if everyone followed their example. An early 19th century culture pretty much dictates an early 19th economy and GNP, too; we’d all be living pretty much like frontier families, except without game to hunt. We’d also be burning wood and coal for heat in uninsulated buildings, and New York would look pretty much like the New York of 1900, when the air was think with smoke and the streets were thick with horse droppings and sewage.
But then, that’s the price you pay for progress.
Here in the United States, we’re free to eat just about any bannana we please; the FDA doesn’t set any standards on this. I don’t mean to frighten you-, but the public service nature of this blog compells me to point out that such laxity leaves us open to the danger of eating abnormally crooked bannanas!
Our cousins in the common market are protected from such dangers, viz.:
Commission Regulation (EC) 2257/94 states that bananas must be “free from malformation or abnormal curvature”. In the case of “Extra class” bananas, there is no wiggle room, but Class 1 bananas can have “slight defects of shape”, and Class 2 bananas can have full-on “defects of shape”.
Unfortunately the comissioners leave it up to the enforcement divison to define “abnormal curvature”- curious, as in the case of cucumbers (Commission Regulation (EEC) No 1677/88) Class I and “Extra class” cucumbers are allowed a bend of 10mm per 10cm of length, and Class II cucumbers can bend up to 20mm per 10cm of length. (This is why so many young Europeans dream of a fullfilling lifelong career as cucumber inspectors.) But woe to the unwary European who finds him or herself in possesion of an illegal bannana when the German BSP (Bannana-Sturm-Poletzi) come crashing through the door.
Here in the US we can only study our more advanced neighbors, and learn from their example.
Once more the French lecture us on how to run a progressive society:
From Macworld:
The French Constitutional Council has approved a law that criminalizes the filming or broadcasting of acts of violence by people other than professional journalists. The law could lead to the imprisonment of eyewitnesses who film acts of police violence, or operators of Web sites publishing the images, one French civil liberties group warned on Tuesday.
The council chose an unfortunate anniversary to publish its decision approving the law, which came exactly 16 years after Los Angeles police officers beating Rodney King were filmed by amateur videographer George Holliday on the night of March 3, 1991.
And once more they reaffirm the words of Tom Wolfe: “Facism is forever descending on America, but it always manages to land in Europe.”
Once again, progressive European culture points the way for the rest of us:
LONDON (Reuters) – Chelsea warned their fans on Friday against throwing celery during matches, saying it was a criminal offence and that anyone caught lobbing the popular salad vegetable could be banned.
Of course, we still have much to teach them about throwing octopus on the ice during Stanley Cup playoffs.
Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of TV ads touting how a “gift” of heating oil from “the People of Venezuela” is helping poor people in the US. The deal was brokered by Massachusetts’ Rep. Bill Delahunt and former representative Joe Kennedy, and is administered by Citgo. Sounds limke a win-win all round.
Well, not quite all around.
The official Venezuelan government figures claim that poverty had been reduced from 60% to under 40%- still extremely high- while independant observers claim the actual numbers range from 60% to over 80%. And the poverty live in Venezuela is far lower than in the US. The average per-capita consumption in Venezuela is only $6700, and that includes all societal strata.
What it comes down to is that Venezuela is, by the standards of Western democracies, a dirt-poor country- but for some reason they’re subsidizing people in the US whose standard of living is many times higher. And they’re doing it by, in essence, giving away a commodity that is responsible for 30% of the nation’s GDP. It’s sort of like me and my neighbors getting together and donating money to the Kennedys, or to Bill Gates. (Scratch that second one. I think we already do that.)
(And speaking of the Kennedys- Joe Kennedy gets a $400,000/year salary from the Citizens Energy Corporation, who put the deal together.)
I’m picturing a family in rural Venezuela living in a one-room house, living by subsistence farming, sitting around eating the daily meal. Dad takes a bite of the evening’s potato stew, and says, “You know, we have it pretty good here. We’ve got a roof, a garden, and there’s a doctor only 50 miles away. But I’ve heard that in Massachusetts there are people who have an income of less than $24,000. Some of them don’t even have cable TV. What say we tighten our belts and maybe send them some oil? And maybe we can throw in a few bucks for Joe Kennedy, too.”
From yesterday’s Detroit Free Press:
Gov. Jennifer Granholm said losing Comerica’s headquarters to Dallas is “sort of like one of your children that you learn is going to another state,” and further illustrates the need to diversify Michigan’s economy.
“I wish it were not happening. It’s not good news for us,” she said. “But on the flip side of it, it’s an opportunity to attract banks who want to headquarter here.”
You kind of have to hand it to her- saying that with a straight face and all. If only other politicians had that sort of positive outlook…
The New York Times, May 4, 1530
Following the failure of his final attempt to scale the fortress wall surrounding Vienna, Sultan Suleiman I was sanguine. Speaking to New York Times reporters, the Sultan remarked “Sure, we’re disappointed. I mean, who wouldn’t be? But let’s look at the positives, too. We’ve all had some really valuable experiences, made a lot of new friends, and scouted some great locations for souvlaki stands, too. Hopefully we’ll come back again one day- say, July 14, 1683- and give it another go.”
This caught my eye this morning:
BARI, Italy (Reuters) – An irate Italian family beat up a principal because they were unhappy with the grades a young relative had received and a ban on cell phones at school.
Three male relatives, including the father and grandfather of the student, punched and pushed principal Ugo Castorina at the Lombardi middle school in Bari on Saturday, police said.
They were angered by grades on the latest report card and by a recent ban by Castorina on cell phones at the school he has run for the past 22 years.
And as we all well know, statistics show that the single most important factor in school success is having a family who are involved in the child’s education.
I’m sure my more globally aware readers have often heard Europeans on the television or radio talking about the superior “European” social model, and wondered what it involves.
BERLIN (Reuters) – A German man drank too much, wet his bed and set fire to his apartment while trying to dry his bedding, police in the western town of Muelheim said Monday.
“He was too drunk to go to the toilet,” said a police spokesman. “The next morning he put a switched-on hairdryer on the bed to dry it and left the apartment.” When the 60-year-old returned, his home and belongings were in flames.
Firemen eventually put out the blaze.
Plus you get all of the ABBA albums.